Mess-Free Shaving WIth King Of Shaves Hyperglide Razors

King of Shaves calls their new Hyperglide shaverrevolubetionary”. Every razor now has a lubricating strip. As guys know, this can get a bit messy. These Hyperglides, on the other hand, have a lubricating gel that activates with water and eliminates that gooey mess.

Their patented system came about from a design that reduced friction from inserting catheters into arteries. Which is pretty amazing that they now use this technology for razors.

Panasonic Shaver with Stubble Detector: Face Time

Since the calendar just hit 11/1, prepare yourself for the annual deluge of electric razor ads. Yes, the holiday season always brings on this phenomenon, and this year, Panasonic’s new ES-LV65-S is aiming to win the shaver war by more than a whisker. Loaded with a 5-blade cutting system, this waterproof device also boasts a stubble detector. The built-in sensor promises to gauge the density of your 5:00 shadow and automatically adjust the motor’s speed accordingly. We’re hearing the ES-LV65-S will cost $450, so you use this Movember thing as a chance to save up.

Bolin Webb X1 Razor: Kinda Like A Ferrari For Your Face

Need fancy car-like performance for your face? Who doesn’t. The British-made Bolin X1 ($105) brings sleek lines and a handle that’s actually finished with automotive paint to your shaving game. Use it with Gillette Fusion cartridges and complete the pimp-my-razor process by picking up the matching magnetic stand.

Whiskey Cologne: Now This Makes Scents

Let’s check the stats: Studies show when men reek of whiskey at 2am, their chances of snagging hot chick digits at the bar dwindle down to 3.2%. But what about when men enter the bar at 11pm while intentionally wearing the aromatic essence of whiskey? Well, we’re about to find out. Commodity has created a little catalog of offbeat scents, including yes, whiskey cologne. The startup is also touting something called “scent tailoring” which encourages customers to find the “scent profile” that fits their style. Let’s hope the “Old Naked Guy in Gym Locker Room” profile is never discovered.

Bacon Condoms: For Flavorful Meat

Our apologies; last week we incorrectly stated that we had seen every possible bacon product possible. Now we’ve seen it all. J&D’s Bacon Condoms ($10) are made of the highest quality latex, so your girlfriend’s hopes that this is simply a novelty product will be crushed like a Corolla at a monster truck show. Plus each condom also comes with a generous slathering of Baconlube inside it, so if your lady doesn’t like bacon, it’s time to look for a new lady.

Harry’s Shaving Blade and Razors: You’ve Been Granted An Extension

While the makers of men’s razors are notorious for dabbling in hyperbole, rarely do you hear them brag about their unit’s handle. But the Truman ($10) shines the spotlight directly on it. A curved rod of zinc alloy forms the solid base, with a blend of high-quality polymers and waterproof lacquer covering the exterior. Or try the Winston ($20), a precision grade aluminum similar in material to those in planes. Harry’s says it all about comfort and control and that you should think of either as an extension of your hand–one long, sharp, not-entirely-safe-for-me-time hand.

Bacon Scented Soap: Just Don’t Eat Your Hands

I don’t recall being asked if I wanted my soap to smell like an Irish spring or a dove, but that’s the crap that’s been foisted on us for decades. But now there’s finally an alternative: bacon scented soap from Man Hands ($5.95). There are other varieties, including cash, cannabis, and baseball glove, but this, this 3 oz. bar of betterment will leave you clean and most importantly, your hands and face will reek of bacon. The women will never know what hit ’em.

Bacon Shaving Cream

We’ve all been there: you’re shaving your face and stuffing it with bacon at the same time when the fat juices start to dribble down your chin, making for a bizarre scent mixture of menthol and smoked meat–not appealing. Bacon Shaving Cream ($14.99) from J&D solves that problem. This luxurious foam is perfect for all skin types and all types of bacon-lovers. This stuff has rich moisturizers, essential oils, and “advanced heat-activated aromatic technology” that makes your face smell like bacon. What the freak else do you need?