Your Favorite Countries, Now in Plate Form

Did you think only ruin porn came out of Detroit? Think again, son, Detroit actually produces quality products now. The Mavs still hang around in the upper echelon of the Western Conference and the Tigers haven’t been that bad these past few years. And, hey, if you love ceramics, and plates, and decorating your house, check out Corbe’s newest line of dinnerware.

Not just any plates though. These come in the shape of your favorite country. Australia, United States, Canada, Ireland, just to name a few. Recreate the march of the pioneers from the East Coast to the West Coast, only this time, with peas.

Corbe handmakes the plates, or ‘handufactures’, them. The U.S. measures about a foot across, but no idea on the weight. Are these foot-breaking heavy or easy to throw at your dinner guests heavy? Order one ($90-120) and find out for yourself.

Scented Duct Tape

Duct tape comes in bland, boring gray and smells like adhesive. That’s…booooring. Buy scented duct tape instead. Amazing smells like cupcake, grape, bubble gum, lemon and orange cream await you with these scented duck tapes by Duck Brand ($4). Each smell coincides with a similar color. If you’re gonna use duct tape, you might as well have fun with it.

Star Wars AT-AT Garden Gnomes

Lay waste to yard rodents and insects with Star Wars AT-AT Garden Gnomes ($40). They come molded in hardcore resin so no backyard nuisance stands a chance. Prop these up and even raccoons will think twice about invading your universe.

Under-Desk Hammock

Swing those tootsies from an under-desk hammock. Intrigued? Read on. It’s an, uhh, under-desk hammock ($30). You strap it onto your desk and slide those sweaty dogs into a comfortable, swaying bed that’ll lull you into a very comfortable place. So much so that you can actually put up with your cubicle neighbor’s too-loud conversations.

Gardenzilla Will Demolish Ordinary Garden Gnomes

Oh, you have a garden gnome? How cute. Meet Gardenzilla. He dwarfs your gnomes and could use them as Q-tips. Put Gardenzilla ($25) in the back or front yard and let garden pests, and neighbors, know you mean business. It measures 9″ tall, so it may not crush tall buildings but it’ll keep watch over the yard just fine.

Stinky Scented Candles Fill Your Home With Gasoline, Bacon, Among Other Smells

When that special lady visits for the first time, set the right mood. Let the sweet scent of gasoline permeate the air. If gasoline doesn’t get that girl’s motor revvin’ (pun intended), Stinky Candles ($7) offers many other aromas to entice. Choose from tens (not tons) of flavors: fresh cut grass, body odor, exhaust (not to be confused with an engine oil scent). They’re all here. Light the money-scented candle and watch her sniff the familiar smell. “Is that..dollar bills I smell?” she’ll ask. “Why yes it is. Freshly minted.” Bow chikka wah wah.

Pinnable Cork Globe

“Stick a cork in it!” They always say that, but no one ever says “stick it in the cork”. And now that you read that, it does sound rather odd. And perverted. But here’s the opportunity to stick it in a cork. A cork globe that is. The cork globe comes set on a stainless steel base and measures 10″ high. A bunch of pins are included so you can mark off those fancy destinations you’ll never visit.

That? Oh, It’s Just My Melting Skull

My face, it’s melting!! How many times have you thought that? If it’s a common occurrence, you definitely need these. It’s a porcelain sculpture called Vibes Melt Down 2043 for use as an incense burner. The picture is self-explanatory. It’s a half-melted skull dissolving into a puddle of gooey skull matter. On a deeper level, it’s an exploratory journey into man’s quest for meaning and sub-conscious examination. It also looks cool on a coffee table.