Ever since Alexander Graham Bell made the first drunk dial to Mabel Hubbard in 1877 (“Sooo, what kind of bloomers are you wearing?”), men and women have been calling each other at 3am to unnecessarily convey their levels of desire for the previously asleep call-receiver. Now, with the Floome smartphone breathalyzer ($80), you can see just how inebriated you are before you dial those digits. The Italian startup behind Floome says it uses the same fuel-cell sensors as police-grade breathalyzers, so that seems good. Just plug it into the headphone jack of your iOS, Android, or Windows smartphone and blow to town. Within seconds you’ll see if you’re safe to call your ex… oh, and also whether you can drive home.