Bolt Action Tactical Pen

Co-workers will be impressed with how threatening you’ve become when you burst into the office with the Bolt Action Tactical Pen ($50). Swiftly and methodically disassemble and reassemble this rifle-esque pen at your desk, blindfolded. Want to woo that special someone in the office? You’ll solidify your “bad boy” image when you lock the pen’s bolt mechanism in place, point it at their heads, and whisper “bang.” Sit in a bathroom stall and polish the  pen’s anodized milled aluminum shell. Keep the door open though! You’ll need to stare as blankly as possible at the wall or any passersby. After buying the Bolt Action Tactical Pen, though, you’ll obviously have to stand up at random intervals during the day and scream the Rifleman’s Creed: “THIS IS MY RIFLE.  THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT, BUT THIS ONE IS MINE.”

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