SodaStream + Samsung Refrigerator: Giving ‘Em The Fizzness

There’s something about the scratch of sugary soda going down your throat that’s just hard to give up–no matter how many Men’s Health editors say the stuff is public enemy #1. And if you can remove the shame from having to purchase gallons of soda on a weekly basis by having it now flow magically out of your refrigerator door, well damn–maybe pop’s got a brand new bag! Samsung has teamed up with SodaStream on a new four-door refrigerator ($3,899) that delivers cold, filtered carbonated water through a replaceable CO2 cylinder. You’ll even get to choose from three levels of fizziness. Perhaps… perhaps life is worth living now.

The Art of Fixing Things: Time To Handyman Up

Not all of us were raised by a Mr. Fix-type of father. My dad’s crowning achievement around the house was getting the VCR to stop blinking 12:00. But getting it to go 3:27… 3:37… 3:27… was hardly a breakthrough. If your handyman skills need some enhancing, pick up The Art of Fixing Things ($12.95) a new guide to becoming the reliable home improvement hero we all aspire to be. You’ll learn 150 tips and tricks, including how to start a stubborn lawnmower or snow blower; how to repair household lamps and appliances; and how to quickly dispose of a corpse (kidding).

Prima Cinema: New Hollywood Hits at Home

When VHS tapes were all the rage, no one cared that their illegal $3 copy of Goodfellas was recorded on a camcorder in the 4th row of the theater. But with the HD craze, the bootlegger was beat back. And now, with PRIMA Cinema ($35,000), he may just go the way of the Dodo. PRIMA brings you current-release Hollywood films delivered automatically over broadband. The video features built-in 3D support and it reportedly has better clarity and deeper colors than current Blu-ray players. On the audio side there’s lossless PCM and Dolby TrueHD audio. Maybe bootleggers can start selling knockoff Hostess products out of their trunks?

Elk & Iceberg Bike Hangers

While I haven’t seen any news coverage about an army of aggressive cockroaches developing poison fangs yet, still, that’s not the the kinda thing you wanna wait on the unreliable news media to get around to. Protect your bicycle from ravenous roach teeth with these solid oak Bike Hangers ($240-$295). They mount to the wall and will safely hang your bicycle out of harm’s way, securing top tubes up to 1.58-inches thick. If two new bike hangers (here’s the other one) aren’t a sign of an impending invasion by these insidious insects, I don’t know what is.

LIFX: Wi-Fi Enabled, Smartphone Controlled Light Bulb

Is it OK to be more excited about a new light bulb than the new iPhone? I think so. Especially when it’s the LIFX ($70), an LED bulb with built-in Wi-fi allowing you to control your lighting and change its colors via smartphone. With an estimated lifespan of 25 freakin years, auto dimming, and the ability to sync to the beats in your phone, the iPhone has some catching up to do.

Fogring: Portable Humidifier/Aroma Diffuser

What’s amazing about The Police’s “Every Breath You Take” is not only the catchy chorus, but the fact that watching someone for every single breath they take requires extraordinary persistence. If you’re thinking about embarking on a similar stalker journey, check out the Fogring, a miniature USB-powered humidifier that floats in your glass of water, cutely improving each one of your breaths. It also serves as a portable aroma diffuser, so you can enjoy the clean air as you skulk menacingly in the closet of the watchee’s home.

Miimo: Robotic Lawn Mower

All of a sudden there’s more lawn mowing robots than there are kids mowing lawns. The latest AI grass cutter/lazy-kid-enabler is Honda’s Miimo. Just set up a boundary via wire and this little gizmo will cut 2-3mm of your grass throughout the week in random patterns, giving your grass a chance to grow all healthy like. The Miimo knows to stay away from rocks and dead opossums, and even returns to its charging station when it’s low on juice. The question is: Do you trust your lawn to the Miimo, LawnBott, or Tango E5? We already know the kid is out of the question.

iRobot Looj 330 Gutter Cleaner

Before we get to the whole robots-are-thinking-for-themselves-and-they’ve-come-to-kill-us deal, we’ve got a lot more help to get from modern-day technology. One of these helpful AI systems is the new iRobot Looj 330 Gutter Cleaner ($300), which helps, not harms, humans by getting in their gutters and tearing through leaves, dirt and clogs with the press of a button. The Looj has enough of a brain to travel down your gutter on its own and adapt to the debris, but not enough to say, slit your throat as you sleep.