Killspencer Athletics: Sporting Goods With a Bad Side

What can you do with a black leather baseball? What’s can’t you do with it!? OK, well, see it at night for one, but other than that, Killspencer Athletics’ new line of sporting goods are ready for just about anything, including a walk down the runway. Choose from a stylish black leather football ($350), black leather soccer ball ($400), and much more. It’s pretty like if Fonzie opened up a sporting goods store, and that’s alright with us.

PowerUp 3.0: The Smartest Paper Airplane We Know

Paper airplane crashes are funny, but they also can hurt–on the inside. When you see your aircraft nosedive into the carpet, it’s a harsh reminder that you mastered neither real physics nor the fun goof-off kind of physics in college. But the PowerUp 3.0 ($40) aims to make any chump a champ as it’s the world’s first smartphone-controlled paper airplane. All you have to do is fold a piece of paper into a plane, attach the PowerUp 3.0 (there’s a propeller/rudder in the back and the Bluetooth tech and rechargeable battery are in the front), and let ‘er rip. It’s built tough and said to be crash-proof, so even when — at its max speed of 10 mph — it hits the pavement, you’ll feel good about giving it the old college try again.

Polaris WV850 ATV: War-Ready Tires

Planning on off-roading it in Syria anytime soon? Or maybe you just wanna never change a flat tire again? Either way, the Polaris Sportsman WV850 H.O. has you covered. The WV850’s non-pneumatic tires are all levels of rugged; they’ve been tested to take AK47 ballistic damage and barely wince. Of course the military had this technology first, but now Polaris has dubbed it TerrainArmor and it can be yours to tow almost two tons with, or just frustrate the hell out of terrorists with subpar aim.

Dimension TWO Longboards: It’s All About The Wood

When you’re riding the big one (we’re talking surfing here), you wanna be standing on some good wood. Dimension TWO Longboards are made from carefully crafted layers of fine beech wood that’s grown on the “sunny side of the Alps.” It promises to offer a tough and wear-resistant surface that can withstand any wave or Mako collision.

KTM X-Bow GT: Bow Down, Mario’s Kart

KTM ‘s new GT version of its X-Bow roadster is a street-legal go-kart–the kind which Mario could only dream of racing. With a new windscreen, side windows and doors, the X-Bow GT is now an even more comfortable ride, while not losing anything in the speed department. An Audi-sourced 2.0-liter inline 4-cylinder gas engine kicks out 285 hp at 6,400 rpm and takes you from 0-62 in 4.1 seconds.The whole thing only weighs 1,867 lbs, so yes, the go-kart handling could not get any more go kartier here.

Klingg: Don’t Watch The Wire(s)

When you’re focused on your workout, there’s nothing more annoying than dangling headphone wires tickling your neck the way your girlfriend used to until she broke up with you and now that’s why you’re in the gym every day cuz you’ll SHOW HER! The Klingg ($20) is a 1 oz. weather resistant pair of neodymium magnets that go through your shirt and provide a simple and secure cord management system. No ear buds falling out. No cords slapping you in the face. Because the only time you should be watching The Wire is when it’s on HBO. (Well, was, from 2002-2008.)

Splitsticks Splitboard: Don’t Make Up Your Mind

Since you were a kid, people have been telling you to make up your mind, whether it was for your choice of Happy Meal toy or the blonde or brunette at The Cheatin’ Beaver. But when it comes to making tracks in the snow, you don’t have to choose. Splitboarding offers the best of snowboarding and skiing as the board separates into two halves. This Splitsticks board promises the perfect blend of carving and climbing abilities. When the terrain is going uphill, just unlock the two sections and make quick work of your trail. Then, on the other side of the mountain, snap them back together and coast down the Beaver for that “happy meal.”

Snolo Sleds Stealth-X

November is here, and before you can say kumqwat pie, there will be snow on the ground and free time to frolic in it. Instead of that rusty old bloodstained toboggan, upgrade your sledding experience this year with the Stealth-X from Snolo Sleds ($3,000).  Made of the badass material du jour, carbon fiber, this thing carves through the powder like your Aunt Helen carves through the pecan pie. It also folds up into a backpack so you can skidaddle (as Helen would say) off the hills quickly when your extremities start to tingle.