The PhoneSoap Charger Recharges and Disinfects Your Stinky Phone

Shall we play a game? Pick up your friend’s phone. Look at it. Hold it up to your ear. Now put that phone up to your nose and inhale like it’s your grandmother’s homemade spaghetti sauce. Smell that? That’s months of built-up ear oil funk on that cellphone screen. And you just put it up to your ear. Sick!

Why walk around with a dirty phone corroded with ear oil funk. Ear oil funk is the #1 cause of pimples on your ear. Fact. Disinfect that nasty telecommunications unit with the PhoneSoap Charger ($50). While the unit charges up the phone inside, two UV-C lamps inside “pass through the cell walls of bacteria and virus to impair their DNA.” When that happens, the cells die, leaving a clean, funk-free phone.

Eton Boost Turbine 2000

For all you restless souls who enjoy secluded areas, fire-walking, and virgin sacrifices, on the next trip to your local tribal village, you can at least enjoy one comfort of home by bringing along the Eton Boost Turbine 2000 ($59). Small enough to fit in your pocket, or hide under your loincloth, this magical little device delivers power to any mobile device that requires a USB port just by gyrating a hand turbine (And I bet you thought you’d never gyrate anything, again). So when you realize that becoming the village fire-king by using a zippo wasn’t such a great idea, because…you know…it runs out! At least you’ll know that your phone won’t.